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Archive for the ‘adopting Paul’ Category

adopting Paul

We have happy news about Paul! We learned this week that he is being adopted by an American family. That is about all we know. It’s a huge answer to prayer! He also is walking now, we were told.

So I’m glad this adoption story has a happy ending. I had often thought that maybe someone else could adopt him, too, but it just seemed so unthinkable–like how would anyone even know about his existence? But the Lord has done it!

I don’t know if we will ever know what kind of family is adopting him; we hope they are believers. But again, this is the answer to many prayers, and not only ours! One little girl here in Kiev has been praying nightly for him for years.

About our own adoption path, now that this pressure is off, I am ready to wait a bit and see how things go. We were back at our regional adoption office, and even though we now own a house, the lady still does not want to approve us as adoptive parents b/c I am a foreigner.

So we’ll see what the Lord wants!

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Stepping Heavenward:

One Woman’s Journey to Godliness

by Elizabeth Prentiss

I love this book. It’s fictional, but some people read it not knowing that it’s fictional, and think it’s real. It reads like it’s real, especially how it presents so many spiritual issues and means of growth that really are very real.

I’ve been sick for a while, and this has been my sick-bed book. And I’ve been blessed by it. I’ve actually read it about three times now this past week.

This time, what’s impressed me is how every hard thing, small or large, is really my means to spiritual growth.  Funny how that iі, that suffering, temptations, difficulties, humiliations, sins are our friends. Reminds me of Martin Luther’s teaching that in Christ we rule over everything—everything in our lives serves us for our spiritual good.

This book has helped me recall in the moments of the day to look to Christ, to let Him be expressed in me in this moment. In this troublesome, annoying, irritating moment. And now, I’m happy for all those moments because they bring me a greater awareness of Christ.

Yesterday, too, I had a freedom of soul about adopting Paul. Just the freedom to take my desires and hands off it. To be OK with whatever happens. And it’s a great freedom; a freedom that let’s God do His work.

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purifying fire

i’m actually really excited. i love insight.

this situation with Paul’s adoption being taken out of my hands–well, God’s giving me insights. I’m going to be slightly painfully honest.

You know how all our deeds will pass through the fire and some will be burned by fire and others will come out as gold (and there are other variations in there).

Let me fish out the passage:

For no man can lay a foundation other than the one which is laid, which is Jesus Christ. Now if any man builds on the foundation with gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, straw, each man’s work will become evident; for the day will show it because it is to be revealed with fire, and the fire itself will test the quality of each man’s work. If any man’s work which he has built on it remains, he will receive a reward. If any man’s work is burned up, he will suffer loss; but he himself will be saved, yet so as through fire. 1 Corinthians 3:11-15

It never occured to me that God Himself is investing now in the quality of our building material–I just thought, whatever my motives were, that’s what will be.

But God really wants us to use eternal building material, so He works now in our circumstances to purify our motives.

Now that Paul’s adoption has been taken out of my hands, God’s convicted me of several self-petting, prideful motives I’ve had for adopting him. Sure it’s not all that, but there are wrong motives in me. I’ve been confessing and God’s been weeding them out. Thank you, God. Thank you for caring enough about me and my eternity with you.

Delays and obstacles are often God’s means of purifying our building materials, so that what we do is lasting, is truly of God.

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God has already put little Paul in your hearts. And He didn’t put him there to break your heart. He is very much in control.

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when it’s hard to post

it’s easy to blog when there are happy, hopeful things to write about isn’t it? it’s nice to read, cheers us, so us-filled (not always in a sinful way).

But i don’t want to just be a fair-weather blogger. I want to blog when I’m going through disappointment and grief and doubt and uncertainty.

Paul’s adoption is basically on hold until we can become property owners. And very honestly, this is moving past the realm of my faith. (Confession: this writing is journal-ish, so hopefully, like David in many psalms, I will be writing myself into spiritual truth, so bear with me here.)

Do you know long I’ve been talking to my dad about us becoming property owners? About three years. Do you know that we mentioned this in our presentation during our last visit to the States, that we really want to find a loan to buy a house, and zero people expressed interest in this. Do you know that ukrainian banks are 1) unreliable 2) charge incredible interest 3) and that notwithstanding, they are currently not giving loans. Do you know that American banks don’t give loans to buy property overseas? We have come to the conclusion that getting a loan from private individuals is probably our only way to go. But that doesn’t seem to be going anywhere.

Currently, a three-room apartment in our region is about $130,000. Two years ago, it was $190,000, so it’s gone down, but we’ve been in a dip and things are starting to go back up.

All around, it’s a great investment, for us personally and just as property investments go. Kiev is a major European city.

But back to my faith, or wait, lets go back to Paul. It’s funny analyzing myself going through all these emotions as we were driving in the car after our meeting today. It’s like a grieving process, not that adopting Paul is totally out, but MY PLAN is dead for now.

Maybe that’s a good thing. Actually, with what I know I about God, I know it is a good thing. God certainly has a plan. He has all our best in His mind, and He works toward that. For example, it is not His will that Paul perish never knowing about His gift of eternal life. On some level, it’s not His will that Paul remain an orphan. It’s a redeemable situation.

It’s God’s will that my heart and faith be strong and pure, and He’s working to that end. It reminds me so much of the many long years I wanted to become a missionary here, and God simply did not allow me to do it. He put the desire there but had me wait.

At the time, you don’t know if the waiting is “no” or simply the waiting before the green light. But learning to trust that God is working out His will for me in all these things, that God’s heart towards me is good, always, always good is key.

So I have been going through the death of my little plan today and I can say that it’s a good thing now. I affirm that I trust that God’s plan is best, for all of us involved.

I affirm that God can indeed provide a way for us to purchase property if that is what our need at this time is, for our family, for adoption, for Paul.  

One of my favorite lines of the Psalms:

No good thing does He withhold from them that walk uprightly.

If it’s a good thing, He will not withhold it. If He withholds it, it was not a good thing for us, for this time.

OK, God, what is Your plan? I am ready to ask and listen.

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father

I had the most intriguing insight tonight as I was praying about Paul.

We, of course, those who have accepted God’s gift of eternal life and salvation, are God’s children.

But we are not the only ones. . . .

A father of the fatherless and a judge for the widows, Is God in His holy habitation. Psalm 68:5 

God identifies Himself as the father of the fatherless. In a sense, orphans, saved or not, are His children.

This gives me great comfort about Paul. We are having some legal hiccups with adopting him right now, and I am so at rest in the fact that God is his Father right now, that He will act on his behalf.

Father of the fatherless.

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adopting soon

i love hearing Skyla and Vika laughing and playing together. Sometimes they just get to giggling, and it’s just so sweet and funny to listen to!

This is the two of them dancing together like the Prince and Cinderella in the little Cinderella cartoon they love watching! THEY ARE SO CUTE, IT KILLS ME!!!!

I was enjoying this again today, and it’s made me so excited about adding Paul into the mix. I think the three of them will have so much fun together! and then I got to seeing Paul added into all our family times and vacations and ministry trips, and I’m just so excited to be adopting a two-year-old boy!

YIPPEE!

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